


What comes around

by alchemicalTyphoon



Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Porn, Masturbation, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-11
Updated: 2019-12-11
Packaged: 2021-02-18 11:41:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21760318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alchemicalTyphoon/pseuds/alchemicalTyphoon
Summary: Loving someone who doesn't remember what the two of you had is hard. Having to sleep in the same bed as them is hard. Hearing them moan your name as they sleep is hard. Being awake during all of this is hard. As hard as your cock is right now.Inspired by an ask.
Relationships: Apprentice/Asra (The Arcana), Apprentice/Julian Devorak
Comments: 20
Kudos: 117





	What comes around

**Author's Note:**

> Blatant unnecessary angsty indulgence. Had to do it ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯. Spoilers for the Asra and Julian routes! Finish those first for maximum angst impact ;)!

His eyes flew open, a moment of panic. _Please let it not be another nightmare._ Asra listened intently in the dark for the telltale whimpering next to him, indicating a bad dream. He heard nothing but even breathing, the occasional shifting of cloth and sheets; they'd always been a restless sleeper when not in his arms. And he hadn't, couldn't hold them any longer. Every time he'd done that, they'd remembered. But every time, it was too much and their mind broke, and he had to erase their memories. And each time, he feared they wouldn't come back anymore, that his spell would become permanent. 

No. He didn't want to risk that... So he lay awake, his love within arm's reach, yet so far away. He closed his eyes, planning to drift back to sleep... 

"... Asra..." 

He froze. It... had been a while, that he heard his name called like that, in their sleepy, soft murmur, with them pressed against his back, their arms encircling his waist or chest, light kisses pressed on his spine. " _Sleep. Now_ ", they'd complain, if they were tired. And he'd have turned around, scooped them up so they'd make that small noise of delight they reserved for when he did that, and when he carried them to bed, they'd have already fallen in a slumber in his arms. He would have laid them down, and even asleep they'd always sought his form out, settling against his side, draping themself half over him. 

He smiled in the dark, wistful, his body aching for them, for their weight and comfort. Knowing full well that was out of his reach, he mentally settled back into falling asleep... 

But they stirred next to him, breathing out a soft moan that woke something within him. He risked a look,... regretting it immediately. 

Next to him, bathed in the moonlight, they softly moaned out his name in quiet longing. Their shirt half-open, exposing their chest... He couldn't help himself, hypnotised by the steady rise and fall as they breathed. The last time they'd called his name like that, they'd laid on top of him and he'd taken them slowly, thrusting up into their warmth. He could still remember how it felt to be inside them, how they'd been reluctant to let him move out, clenching, gripping around his cock. 

He was hard, fighting against the urge to rouse them, to wake their memories of the two of them, together and connected, mind, body, and soul. He worried the inside of his cheeks, trying to stay still as they uttered a half-moan and stirred, fingers twitching. 

A moment passed in silence. Then another. Asra started to relax a little, certain he could endure this night when his eye caught movement along with the sound of a sigh. He turned and watched, wide-eyed, as they slid their hand under the band of their sleeping shorts. And he knew they were touching themself when sleepy moaned sighs escaped their lips. His mouth turned dry and his breathing got as hard as his cock as he watched and heard them work their way to a slow, sleepy climax, calling out his name in a satisfied, shuddering exhale. 

They stilled, and the silence was broken by the sound of their steady breathing once more. Asra's gaze was transfixed on the hand still down their shorts and he tried desperately not to think of cleaning their hand, of sucking down on each finger while looking at them in that way that made them weak, of lapping up every trace left on their palm. He'd hold eye contact until they surrendered in embarrassment, after which he'd tease them with a lewd hum, knowing full well it would make the flush on their cheeks even deeper. Then, once their hand was clean, he'd trail kisses up their arms, their shoulder, nuzzle their neck and murmur their name and 'I love you's' on their skin. 

He'd feel their hands touch him, making his skin burn and come alive as they trailed up to card through his hair. They'd breathe his name in his ear with an intense desire, wanting him, needing him. And he'd tease, sliding his cock against their clit, straining himself, holding on to that shred of willpower not to wet all of his cock in their juices, to keep teasing until they desperately begged for him to enter. He'd give in, because he always did in the end, and they'd welcome him, warm, soft, pliant, swallowing him whole and drowning him with their need for him, until the only things in his mind were the sensations of the two of them, and he'd give them everything as he spilled inside them. 

Asra let go of a shuddering breath, sweating, heart pounding in his chest, trying to ignore his cock, stiff, hard, and sensitive, straining against the cloth confining it. He lay there, turning on his side so he couldn't see the sweet temptation behind him. The throbbing between his legs didn't subside, was made even worse when they shifted and he heard his name once more, a sweet mumble for him to hold them. 

It was too much. 

Carefully, he shifted, hooking his thumbs underneath the band of his pants. He slid the band down, over his hips. Biting down a hiss, he managed to free his straining member. Recalling the spell they taught him long ago, he slicked his hand, and palmed himself. Finishing the spell, he gripped himself at the base, and started stroking slowly. Not wanting to wake them up and invite an uncomfortably awkward talk, he kept his pace slow, biting his pillow to keep quiet as he build up the pressure. His mind provided enough material of their times together that it didn't take long before he felt the telltale shiver at the base of his spine, and came over his hands and sheets. 

He lay there for a moment, catching his breath and steadying himself. His physical need was met for now, but his heart and soul still ached for theirs to respond. 

Behind him, he heard the rustle of cloth and movement. Asra instantly stiffened and stilled, but they'd only adjusted their sleeping position. Relaxing slowly, he used another spell to clean up the mess he'd made, careful not to leave any traces of his lapse in restraint. They were likely going to act awkwardly already once they realised they'd masturbated in their sleep, he thought with an amused smile. He carefully shifted, turning around so he could watch the adorable mess they were. 

Asra reached out, carefully tucking a lock of their hair behind their ear. "I love you", he whispered under his breath. "I miss you. I should have come back sooner." He covered them with their blanket, causing them to sigh at the warmth. "I'm here now. Please look at me. Please remember me again. I'll wait for you, however long you need me to..." 

\--- 

Some time later, he would be at the docks, saying farewell to them. They were radiant, fitting much better with Ilya and his drama than they had with him. The plague doctor had succeeded in the one thing he never had; drawing them out of the city and showing them the world. He wanted to call out to them, to beg them to _stay_ with him. A reversal of events years ago, when it was _them_ who had begged _him_ to stay. 

But he swallowed down any hope he had along with their name. It was okay. He loved them and this was okay, he thought, plastering a smile on his face. He'd be fine, this would heal, he thought, waving at them as the ship sailed away from Vesuvia, as it sailed away with half his heart.

And he wondered if this was how they had felt, when he left them to cry behind the closed shop door, all those years ago. 

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by an ask
> 
> Dont imagine Asra trying to keep himself from touching his erection because you just moaned his name 3 times in your sleep. Dont imagine him squirming and trying to go back to sleep but the throbbing between his legs is torture. Dont imagine him taking off his pyjamas and underwear and stroking his length as he recalls how you sounded when you moaned his name. Its been too long since he had your affections but you cant remember so he will suffer in silence for now; his hand the only solace. 
> 
> Feel free to yell at/with me :D!


End file.
